Why You Should Love a Knitter

(or crocheter!)

I know this isn’t clever or new, but dating does get harder as one gets older. There are fewer opportunities to meet people, I think. In this day and age it’s even harder to find someone with similar interests, or at least someone who can appreciate your interests.

From my experience with this, I have developed what I call the spinning test. It works like this: in a conversation with a potential suitor, I find an appropriate time to mention that something I choose to do for fun is to take wool from a sheep and a tool that is thousands of years old to make yarn. His reaction determines whether or not I wish to proceed (and for those of you wondering, I sure am still single). One time, a guy got me going on what kind of spinning wheels I like, and then he asked me if those wheels were like the wheels on his Ferrari. Look at how much time the spinning test saved me there!

I also once met a guy who admitted to my face that he would never marry a knitter, which blows my mind. I know the usual grandma-image we knitters get saddled with isn’t very sexy, but most of us aren’t grandmas. One should be able to figure that out quickly, but for whatever reason yarn-related interests still get a bad rap.

I feel I need to stand up for my tribe and let you know why anyone should love a knitter, crocheter, or otherwise yarn-enthused person.

1. You’d get warm things

Let’s start with the most obvious: if there’s a knitter who loves you, you are going to have the best warm things to wear. Be careful about asking for anything at first, knitters love a lot of people (many knit for charities, so they’re generous too!). There’s also the sweater curse that every knitter has a different opinion about, but if it’s meant to be, you’ll likely end up with quite the collection of couture winter wear.

2. Knitters have patience (because we knit)

I can’t tell you how many spoken-for knitters tell me “Oh, my [insert significant other title here] wanted to watch their television show last night, which was great. I got all this knitting done!” Most of us don’t mind waiting for our turn with the remote, or waiting in general, if we have our project to work on. That being said make sure we can have our project to work on. A really quick way to fall out of favor with a knitter would be to drag them somewhere they don’t want to be sans project.

3. There are worse addictions out there than yarn

A knitter’s love of materials can get a little out of hand, but at least yarn is small, it doesn’t spoil, and it doesn’t negatively affect anyone’s health (This is also a good thing to remember if you already love a knitter). My mom would say this of me when I was in high school: “If she’s spending that much money on yarn, at least I know she’s not buying drugs.”

4. Knitters appreciate hard work

Knitters understand that you climb a mountain a step at a time. After all, sweaters are just a stitch done hundreds or thousands of times. When people make progress in any increment, knitters applaud it because it’s one step closer to the top of the mountain. All knitters have also faced pitfalls, made mistakes, and they never let those keep them down. If they know they can live with it, they continue on their way. If they can’t live with it, they backtrack their work, fix it, and then continue on their way. Knitters are very resilient.

5. Knitting has great health benefits

And the non-knitters ask “what does that have to do with me?” Most marriage vows include “in sickness and in health,” right? You’d much rather it be in health, I’m sure. There are a variety of studies showing the health benefits of knitting, including warding off mental health problems like depression, anxiety, and dementia. It’s been known to help battle chronic pain and addictions (see #3). The repetitive motions are said to cause the same effects in the brain as meditation, so it’s a great general stress reliever too. Just saying, maybe your current significant other would nag you less if they were a knitter.

So that’s why you should love a knitter! Since we’ve got all that covered, I’d like to finish out my post with some tutorials about stretchy cast-ons that are good for socks. The long-tail is a good one, but here’s a couple of other ones I like:

Did we lose the non-knitters? Excellent.

Knitters, crocheters, other yarn-lovers, lend me your ears. I just shared with everyone how awesome you are, and how awesome your craft is, but you shouldn’t have to convince anyone of either.

Here’s what I love about single knitter life:

1. No “yarn budgets”

I was on reddit the other day and about threw up. A woman was bragging about the $40 a month budget her husband has set her for yarn. When I have shared this sad nonsense, a lot of people respond “Well, she’s probably a stay-at-home mom.” So what if she is?! She’s not the babysitter, she doesn’t need an “allowance.” Now, if it had been “my husband and I set myself a yarn budget,” good for you guys being adults and managing your finances. This one wasn’t, and I could never deal with that.

2. No hiding yarn/projects

We all laugh at the various knitting memes about having to get creative with our yarn storage. If it’s just you, you don’t have to sneak that yarn into the house. Leave your project in progress out on the couch, it’ll be there, untouched, when you get back. Think of how much time is saved not having to hide stuff away, that gives you so much more time for knitting.

3. More selfish knitting

Now, we’ve already discussed knitters’ inclination to knit things for people they care about. The person knitters usually forget to knit for is themselves, and that’s important too. You can accomplish selfish knitting when you’re in a relationship, I’ve seen it, but it is easier to knit for yourself when there’s one less significant person to knit for. Also, you can’t sweater curse yourself.

So please, do whatever makes you happy, but maybe don’t settle on a partner who belittles whatever that is. Find your own spinning test if you need to!